I wrote this fantastically long piece on Moses and life change and murder and mayhem. It was great. Ok it wasn’t great it was actually terrible. Writing is hard. Especially when one is trying to cut back on coffee and clear through the clutter on her desk to determine what must stay and what must go. I find my mind overwhelmed by this concept lately. I could put the blame at the ballet clad feet of Marie Kondo but that seems unfair. I have entered a phase of renewal. A phase where I must cleanse and restore. At least that’s what my star word tells me.
Ah yes, the star word. We passed out star words this week after I read about them and thought they might be a great way to begin our year. It has been a great exercise. Receiving the gift of these words has challenged and delighted, caused a little consternation and a lot of discussion. It did more than I ever expected and discovering where some of the words we used landed really demonstrated to me the amazing gifts of God in action.
Still I got renewal. The worst word. So hard for me because there is no clear path forward. So many things in life could be renewed! My life, my energy, my faith, my work, and the list goes on. It could be about the community of faith, or a community in which I am a part of. Renewal extends. Renewal Is about making changes to improve. It’s about beginning again after having stopped for a while. It’s the practice of renewing, reestablishing, restoring and perfecting. It’s so much work. And so much to contemplate. It would have been so much easier to get the word “Travel”. Still “Renewal” it must be as that is the star I drew. To renew, to rebuild, refresh, revive…. Whatever this year brings it will definitely be interesting.
Renewal implies building upon and making better. Also rest. I’m terrible at rest but work, work I can do. I can rest to. Don’t think I don’t rest but work, having a goal? That, that I am good at. I like to set targets, to have something I am working towards. I’ve been working a lot lately purging, removing and restoring order in my home. I’ve donated, shredded, recycled and thrown out if nothing else was at all possible. I don’t feel like I’m renewing I feel like I’m overhauling. It feels as though I’ve broken down and am building up as much as I possible can. I guess that is in a way what renewal is. The point at which you decide to break things down so you can put them back together better. The point where you take what is old and shape it into something new.
This year will bring something different and new. A renewal somehow. I look forward to seeing how it all unfolds.